Happiness is....

....a full house, then an empty house.  We hosted Christmas this year at our house.  My mother and sisters arrived Christmas Eve, though only one of them actually stayed at the house.  Oh - and Oliver, Boomer's doggie cousin arrived as well.  On Tuesday, A's parents came.  So we were 7 for dinner.  My brother and his girlfriend dropped in after dinner, so then we were 9.  It was lovely having everyone and dinner was terrific.  The living room was chock full with all 9 of us and 2 puppy dogs.  Last night, we again had my sister and Ollie staying over and A's parents as well.  All are gone now, and while it's fun to have a housefull, it will be nice to be back to just me, A and the Boom Doggie tonight.

Newtown

I want to talk to you about Newtown.  I grew up in Bethel, the next town over. Newtown was quite literally our backyard.  As an adult, one of my first jobs was working for the Town of Newtown.  It is a beautiful town, lots of farmland and rolling hills and meadows.  Newtown is a large town in terms of square miles, but not population-wise.  It is a typical small New England town.  Back in the 80s, when I worked there, it didn't even have much shopping.  Years ago, a woman named Mary Hawley donated money to the Town to build a library, a school and the Town Hall.  Once upon a time, the Town Hall had a bowling alley in it.  When I worked there, it still had a gym in it and a movie theater.  It is one of those second run theaters where the movies are really cheap.  There is a beautiful meadow near the downtown where the Town Christmas tree stood. Main Street is lined with big, old beautiful historic homes.  But for me, what always symbolized Newtown, visually anyway, is the flagpole.  It's a huge flagpole, smack dab in the middle of Main Street.  Every once in a while, people would argue that it was a safety hazard.  Maybe so, but when you come around then bend, heading into Town, and you see the American flag flying there, well, it is just an awesome sight.  I've seen so many beautiful pictures of the flag flying on that flagpole, the saddest being the one I saw this weekend, with the flag lowered to half mast in memory of the students and faculty murdered at Sandy Hook Elementary School.
A & I were home Friday morning, I had taken a vacation day because we had a wedding to go to that afternoon.  While we sat a the kitchen table, A noticed something on one of the feeds he gets on his phone.  He gets dispatches from various fire departments.  He said "There's a report of shots fired at a School in Newtown."  Moments later, from the dispatches, we knew it was Sandy Hook Elementary.  I turned the TV to a news channel, but It hadn't hit the wires yet.  We sat and listed to the fire and ambulance calls, the police calls were scrambled, thank God.  It was scary, but didn't seem horrific yet.  A picked up on things that went over my head, but he would recognize that stuff having been an EMT.  Soon enough, it was on TV.  Watching the news unfold, it was so hard to accept that this had happened in Newtown.  Having grown up in that area, it is one of the last places I would have expected it.  Danbury yes, even Bethel or Brookfield, but Newtown? But really, we all now that it can happen anywhere.  And, of course, it is made all the more horrific by the fact that it happened at an elementary school, to children just starting to learn, who didn't get a chance to live.  And it happened during the holiday  - Hanukkah, Christmas - a time of such my and excitement for children.
 I wondered if I would know anyone who lost a family member.  I had gone to high school with a lot of Newtown kids, I had coworkers who lived there, I studied and taught karate there.  I worried how my brother was doing as an educator in the areas biggest community, Danbury.  Tragedies like this affect us all on various levels.  It hits all Americans hard, parents maybe a little harder, those from  Connecticut harder, those of us from the Newtown area even harder, then of course those in Newtown harder yet and so on down to those who lost someone.
When you remember the people of Newtown in your prayers, especially the parents and loved ones of the lost, please also remember those who witnessed the horror.  The children who survived, their teachers, the police and the volunteer firemen and ambulance corps that responded need our thoughts and prayers now too.

Happiness is....

....a repeat - but it does make me happy - Boomer doing his little dance when I give him a scratch on his back near his tail.  He's so cute.  He arches his back like a cat and does this thing where he just kind of rocks on his back legs.  Clearly he likes his little back scratch.  Now - what happiness isn't?  Boomer doing his nearly silent cry by the side of the bed at 4:15 am.  Seriously?  He wanted up in the bed.  That wasn't happening.  And I'm pissed that he woke me up.

Still Here

Last week was busy!  We headed up to the Cape for Thanksgiving.  My mom was also turning 80 over the weekend.  There was lots of family time.  Lots of eating.  Not as much drinking as I thought there might be.  Not enough football really - that's because being up in Mass, I couldn't watch the UCONN game on TV and because I wouldn't call that event on the evening of Thanksgiving between the Jets and Pats a football game.  It was more of a farce.  I'm not a fan of either team so I didn't much care who lost.  But really Jets - really?  Yes, J-E-T-S now stands for Just End The Season to many Jets fans.  I can see why.  Anyway, a good time was had by all.  We even got our uncle to make us crepes for breakfast one morning.  To Die For!  That's showing my French Canadian roots a little.  Took the Acela back home from Boston yesterday, A had to work Saturday, so he went home early.  I really do enjoy train rides.  Tonight, I may take a moment or two and see if I can create our Christmas card - must get it done before snapfish cuts me off!  And it looks like we'll be hosting Christmas at some level.  I will invite my family - but some invitation - "please come for Christmas, but you won't be able to stay here overnight".  The in-laws are headed to Florida the day after Christmas, so we are inviting them to stay overnight rather than heading back 2 1/2 hours away from Florida.  And since our attic room has been taken over by a lot of storage, I'm not sure I can have it guest-ready by Christmas.  Mainly because I'm not sure where we could put everything that we have stored up there!

So - I'm rambling.  Bye.

Some Friday Photos

It snowed Wednesday, so for your viewing pleasure, some first snowfall pictures.  Starring in the photos, none other than the Boom Doggie.

Happiness is....

.....four more years!  I was not an Obama fan right from the start back before the 2008 elections.  In the NY primary, I voted for Clinton.  I felt she had more experience and therefore was the better candidate.  When it turned out to be Obama v McCain, I was unsure where to go.  Voting for a Republican would be hard for me, but McCain was the kind of Republican I could get behind.  I was still concerned about Obama's lack of experience.  Then McCain chose Palin as his running mate.  Game over.  Easy decision.  This time around, it was an easy decision from the start.  While I think President Obama has been only slightly better than average - I would say C+ to B- as a President, I think Romney would have been far worse.  His plans - when he would talk about them - were reminiscent of the days of supply side (aka trickle down) economics.  Those policies failed.  It just doesn't work.  I don't think the next four years are going to be easy.  We need to find a way for Congress to bridge their differences.  We need less concern about individual districts and states and interests and more concern about what policies help the country most overall.  I don't know how Obama supporters would have reacted to a loss, but I'm saddened by some of the ignorant comments I see from Romney supporters.  One such comment was "you should have to pay taxes to vote."  Okay - so college students shouldn't get to vote?  Stay at home moms or dads don't get to vote?  How about people who retired on a disability pension that is tax exempt - they don't get to vote anymore?  The comment was reactionary - thinking that all our problems are a result of those on welfare.  Yes, our welfare system needs further reform.  Yes, people take advantage of the system.  But does our welfare system need more reform than the tax system that allows very wealthy people to pay a lesser percentage of their income in taxes than the middle class, because their wealth allows them to take advantage of tax exemptions or tax provisions?  No.  Both need revision.   Our problems are not solely the result of one system or another.  They are the result of multiple systems and the refusal of our representatives in Washington (both houses here) to give up any of their programs or accept modifications to them.  There has to be give and take from all parties and, as I see it, there is mostly an attitude of "I'll take and you give"  and that just doesn't work.

In the aftermath of Sandy

Saturday morning, A & I went to the Rockaways, to help out at the home of one of A's fellow R-1 firefighters.  A had been down there on Thursday with a couple of other guys to bring S the basics - gas for a generator, propane stove, propane heater, milk and other non-perishables.  On Friday, 7 guys from R-1 showed up to demo his basement - take out all the damaged items, strip the wallboard and start the cleanup.  When we got there Saturday morning, there was a pile 5 or 6 ft high in the street.  As we came through Queens, we could see the flood line by looking at where the garbage was still stuck in the trees and fences.  You could see the storefronts with the moisture on the inside from having been flooded.  Going further, through an area called Broad Channel, there was car after car sitting on the median of a four lane road.  They had been towed there as part of the cleanup.  Again, you could see the moisture on the inside.  There was a boat, blocking one lane, thrown there by Sandy.  We get to S's neighborhood and their is sand everywhere, in the streets, the yards, everywhere.  Sandy left it there.  And now there was trash, as people carted what had once been furniture, insulation, family mementos, appliances, walls, floors - pieces of their lives - out into the street.  NYC Sanitation trucks were evident.   The gas company was there as well.  No real signs of FEMA or the Red Cross though - disappointing.  We helped S bleach his walls. to try to prevent mold from growing  We carted some more stuff out to the street.  A few more R-1 guys came to work on his furnace, with plans to hook him up to get hot water.  S was in good spirits.  He was most sad at the loss of his books.  His girlfriend gave me some of his Christmas decorations, asked could I take them home and try to clean them.  They meant more to him than the TV that was lost.  I wished that I could do more.  I walked down to the beach with his girlfriend.  I saw where the boardwalk used to be.  In one area, it looked like Sandy had just picked up the boardwalk whole and dumped it a few feet away.  The destruction was just incredible.  I don't think it overwhelmed me until we went to leave.  We went out a different way.  This time, we went by where the water was still in the street, some from the storm, some from being pumped out of basements.  We saw a store where people were standing outside eating.  From their behavior, I think it may have been their first hot meal in days.  We saw a burned out row of stores and apartments.  We saw home after home with their belongings, now trash, piled out front.  A commented that I was very quiet.  I told him that I was still taking it all in.  This damage that I saw,  I think is not the worst damage from Sandy. 
Sandy's aftermath also showed the good.  I've said in here at times how the FDNY is a family.  And it has never been so evident as in the aftermath of this storm.  The guys in R-1 are rallying around S, getting him what he needs to continue.  This is happening throughout the city - firefighters helping brother firefighters.  And not just their brothers from the FDNY, but their brothers' neighbors.  The gas we have supplied to S, he shares with his neighbors.  I have heard that the DC FD and the Boston FD band members are coming to help out.  One of the guys in R-1 offered some construction equipment to help S out, he didn't need it, but the message went back saying that they could use it in Breezy Point. 
Power is coming back on in more and more places.  Downed trees are cut up and hauled off.  Roads are opening, schools are opening.  People are going back to work.  In the aftermath of Sandy, there is despair, but there is also love and family and friendship. 

Sandy

We survived Sandy.  We lost some shingles off the roof - not sure what section yet - but no other damage that I am aware of at this point.  We are very, very lucky.  Boomer was antsy all day long.  He does not like wind.  At one point, he settled down, went to sleep at my feet - actually on my feet.  I didn't dare move for fear of waking him.  He finally really settled down when I decided to go up to the bedroom and let him in my bed.  Then he was out, snoring away.  A worked all day yesterday.  They activated an extra Rescue Company and he was in it - stationed in Brooklyn.  Sounded like it may not have been too busy during the day, but in the evening, they had to rescue 20 people from a flooded neighborhood, then they just started running from fire to fire.  It's a mess in the City today.

Got to love my doggy

Some doggy cuteness for you...
First, last night, A was laying on the couch.  I was kneeling on the floor next to him, kissing him.  I had my arm behind his head.  I feel this nudging under my arm and then all of the sudden there's this little black nose there.  Followed by a cute little doggy face giving out kisses.  Funny dog.  I just laughed.  He's always wiggling in.  If we are standing in the kitchen hugging or kissing, he wiggles between our legs.  You can understand why sometimes he gets locked out of the bedroom!

Then, this morning, while I'm cooking my breakfast, Boomer was outside doing his business.  I left the door open so he could come in when he wanted. Well - he comes racing in, dashes around and up the stairs.  Then I hear a noise, so I go investigate.  The blinds have been knocked around on the window at the top of the stairs.  And then I hear - fluttering.  He chased a freakin' bird into the house and up the stairs.  I shut him in the bedroom and tried opening the window to get the bird to fly away.  The bird was so small, it kept sliding down between the two windows.  Finally I got a dishtowel, managed to wrap the bird up in it and took it outside where it flew away.  Whew!  I go up and open the bedroom door and let me tell you - I so wish I had taken a picture of the look on that dog's face and the wagging tail.  He was so happy.  That tail was just wagging away.  He was so damned pleased, honestly, it made my heart happy.  But I would prefer no further birds in the house.

Happiness is...

....sleeping in my own bed with my own pillow.  Back from Italy on Monday - the town we were in was lovely - see some pictures below - but it's always nice to come home to your own bed.

Are you a planner?

I tend to be a planner when we are going on a trip somewhere.  I'm not good with being spontaneous.  I much prefer to know how I'm getting where I'm going, where will I be staying, where will I be eating, etc.  I have done a couple of road trips with A where we did not make hotel reservations, just drove until we got tired and found a place.  Mostly this worked out fine, but one trip we kept finding hotel after hotel was full, so we finally called ahead a few towns and made a reservation.  I really don't like to leave things to the last minute.  And my definition of the last minute is probably different than most people.  I like to have plans that can be wrapped up in advance done so about a week ahead.  I also plan out and list what I will wear on trips day by day.  This avoids both overpacking and underpacking.  Although I do still tend to overpack, but not to extremes.  I think that the thing for me is that by limiting the number of unknowns, I can relax and enjoy much more easily.  And by getting things done well in advance, I am less stressed in the days leading up to a trip.  We are heading out next week for the famous wedding in Italy.  The flights and hotel have been in place for months.  Airport transfers have been taken care of.  I have already gotten our passports out.  They are with the electrical adaptor set so that I will forget neither item.  Tonight, I will be checking all of our chargers that must make the trip to see if I need to bring the little transformer thing as well.  A is in charge of dealing with cell phone use overseas.  The banks know we are going, it's all coming together.  Next on the list is making an appointment to get my nails done.  Important stuff you know!

Friday Photos

It's been a while.  I haven't taken a whole lot of pictures, but I have some new ones of a couple of finished knitting projects, so here goes.  The first two are a pattern called Damsak, knit in Wollemeise.  The last two are a patten called Annis, knit in Sanguine Gryphon Skinny Bugga!  The last one is an old picture of Boomer.  I think it's from last year, because the mum plant next to him is much bigger now.

 

 



Happiness is....

...8 years of marriage.  Yesterday was A's and my 8th anniversary.  YAY us!

Cheating on my diet

I didn't think I was cheating that much, but I must be.  I am at the same weight again.  At least my scale says so.  My body doesn't.  I definitely felt thinner the last few days.  So, what to do?  Well, I'm going to relax a little this week on the diet.  I'm not going off the reservation.  My plan is to continue to eat healthy foods, but not worry as much and hopefully avoid the cheating that sets me back.

To frog or not to frog

I think I'm going to frog.  For the non-knitters - that means to basically undo my project.  Sometimes it means just going back a few stitches or a few rows.  In this instance, I think I'm frogging the whole project.  I like the yarn.  I like the pattern.  I like them together.  What I don't like is the gauge at which I'm knitting it.  I started this project a couple of years ago when I first took up knitting again - and took it up seriously.  I still had a lot to learn - not that I don't still have a lot to learn - but I know a lot more know than I did some 3 years ago when I started this project.  (Note - I just went and looked at my project page on ravelry and I started it almost 3 years ago to the day.)  So, it's been sitting there, I decided to take it back up again.  It's a wrap I started for my mother-in-law.  I put it aside when I realized that I could not finish all the projects I had planned for Christmas, so some things had to be back-burnered.  It was a long burner!  Anyway - here's what I have learned - if you substitute a different weight yarn in a pattern, you may want to increase the needle size accordingly.  This pattern called for fingering weight yarn.  I decided to use DK weight.  Thing is, I used the needle size recommended in the pattern, bur remember the pattern is for fingering weight yarn.  I should have increased the size of my needle.  The gauge at which this is knitting up will not get me the nice airy effect of the lace pattern that I would like.  So, I'm going to frog this.  The next real question is do I re-knit with a larger size needle or do I put the yarn towards another project.  Last Christmas, my MIL showed me a shrug she had and asked me if I could knit her another one like it.  The one she has is a very simple rectangle, just seamed to create armholes.  So, I think my best bet is to go forward and knit her the shrug she requested.  If I can reuse this DK yarn for that - cool, it's a color I know she likes.  Otherwise, I will set this yarn aside and decide what to do with it that later and just get some other lovely yarn for the shrug.

still on those last 5 pounds

UGH I was doing well last week, then big party on Saturday - there went that.  I'm feeling a bit defeated - but I'm not giving up.

9/11

Most of us will go on about our daily lives today, taking a moment to remember.  To remember the innocents who were murdered.  To remember those who fought to save them, and in doing so died along side them.  Remember also those who came after.  Those who searched for survivors.  Those who worked to bring their brothers home.  Those who toiled upon the pile to bring closure to the families of the victims.  We don't know the effects of that work, those months on the pile, what that did to them psychologically, what it did to them physically.   Take a moment today to remember them all. 

Tribute

Some things can not be adequately expressed, yet cry desperately to be told
told to those you know and love
to those you meet in passing
told to the children of today
and to those who are yet unborn
You need to tell them what you saw that day
And make them see....
the ones who fought with hand and axe
and took the stairs by twos,
who looked into the face of death
and stayed its hand,
if only for a moment,
with a calm ferocity of spirit
the ones in uniform and those without
who vanished in the coming of a madman's dream
the fatherless...the motherless...the childless who remain to mourn them
Tell them of the great heart of a great people
And let them ask, and let them hear your answers.
To our friends and colleagues at the New York City Fire Department
To the men and women of the Police Department and emergency medical services
To all who have sacrificed and those who will.
We will tell your stories.
We will remember.

Getting back on track

With my calf injury, I got a little sidetracked.  Considering the weekend on the Cape and some other events, the damage wasn't too bad.  But, I seriously need some refocusing.  I feel like I'm there.  I went to walk this morning - but the rains came 5 minutes in.  So, off to the gym tonight.  I started back to waking on Saturday, taking it slower.  I had been seriously focused on maintaining a brisk pace before my injury, but I've backed off that.  I do not want to get re-injured.  Now I just need to figure out how to motivate A to get out there and do some cardio of his own.

Skunked again!

Damn dog! And with A working tonight too.  Once again he got it in the face and clearly took some in his mouth. He was foaming.  Scary stuff.  Not fun cleaning him up, but I think I got it off.  It helps that he's mostly white, so you can see where he was sprayed.

My dog has a hard head.

Ask me how I know!  Sunday night, I was playing with Boomer - he was running around my mom's house, having a grand time just dashing around.  As I knelt there, waiting for him to return - well - he returned.  He hit me head on - skull to skull.  I never saw it coming.  He came from behind and just clocked me.  It took me a little bit to get up.  No one even knew it had happened - they were all either out on the porch or in the kitchen.  When I finally felt like I could get up, I went and got myself an ice pack, then proceeded to the security of A's arms, crying because it hurt.  It really freaking hurt.  Dang dog has a seriously hard head.  My sister was worried about a concussion, but I never lost conciousness.  I think Boomer felt bad - poor dog was just playing.  But DAMN his head is hard. 

Happiness is...

....making plans.  Tomorrow is A's firehouse picnic.  The crowd may be small this year, but most of my favorite people will be there.  YAY!  Saturday, we are headed up to the Cape and will spend my birthday with my family.  YAY!  YAY!  Good things.  Happy things.  And, my knitting projects are coming along nicely.  I learned to make nupps.  I don't see a lot of them in my future, but I've done it. 

stuck

No change in the weight.  Again.  I think this is 3 or 4 weeks now.  If I were at my goal, I would be thrilled, but I really want to lose 5 more.  It's not that I look bad now, but I could look better and a few more clothes would fit.  And my goal weight is higher than I used to consider my ideal weight, so I don't want to keep increasing that number.  To further complicate things, I've got a little injury.  I think I've got shin splints in my right leg.  (Is it still the plural splints if it's only one muscle?)  The muscle is very sore, so I"m going to take a day or so off from my walking regimen.  And I'm going to try to stick to the plan more closely - but I've got some challenges this week.  What I don't want to see is the scale finally move - in the wrong direction.

What was God thinking?

Do you ever wonder that?  I do.  Like when I look at crab grass.  What was He thinking?  What useful purpose does crab grass serve?  I wonder what he was thinking with spiders and snakes and bees - but I do get that they serve a useful purpose.  But crab grass?  Not convinced.  It's annoying as all get out.  We finally get our front lawn looking good and WHAM crab grass.  It's a bit of a battle.  See, the neighbors to our left, the neighbors to our right, the neighbor across the street - none of them really give a hoot about the crab grass.  Well, the ones to the right might care, but they do nothing about it.  The one across the street is into the natural look.  At first, she didn't even own a power mower.  She used a environmentally friendly mower - aka a push mower.  The thing with those is that the blades can't move fast enough to cut all kinds of grass & weeds.  She finally got an electric mower, but fertilizer and weed control?  Not happening there.  And then there's the problem neighbors to our left.  I think they have embraced crab grass as a design feature.  It lines their driveway and sidewalk.  And it creeps over into our yard.  So, we fight on in the battle against the crab grass, a piece of God's creation that I just don't get.

Stuck

I've been stuck on the same number for a couple of weeks.  UGH.  I suppose though, it's better than the number going up.  I will rededicate myself this week.  My goal is to be down 5 by the 15th of September. 

New York State is big and other thoughts

New York State is really big.  I know it's not as big as Texas, California, Alaska and various other states - but when you come from little Connecticut, New York State is big.  We went to a shower for A's brother and his fiancee this weekend.  It was in the Finger Lakes Region.  That's about 5 1/2 hours from our home (6 if you are driving a little slower after getting pulled over for speeding).  It amazes me that we could be that far from home and still be in the same state.  I would see other cars with NY plates and think "Hey another NYer"  and then remember DUH - we're in NY.

At a barbecue with families from the firehouse, the wives were sitting around discussing things.  One thing discussed was that beige panties are dull.  Yes, they are boring.  But they have their place.  Like when you are wearing something on your lower half that is not completely opaque.  One doesn't really want to be wearing dark undies under that flowy white skirt, because if the wind snugs it up against your butt, they show.

I like seeing farms, farmland and farmhouses.  I just think they are pretty.

Proseco is good stuff.  I need to get me some.

Knitting in the car is relatively easy.  Tinking in the car, not so much.  Tinking sticky yarn like Noro Silk Garden, not my favorite activity.

adulthood is hard

Sometimes trying to be an adult downright sucks.  Trying to do the right thing is not easy.  Resisting the urge to have the last word in an argument is really really hard, especially when the other party couldn't do the same, but right now, that's what I'm doing.  I'm sucking it up and I'm not happy about it but I know it's best in the long run.  I'm angry and sad.  Trying to let the recent crabbiness just roll off my back.  But dealing with the digs, I can only let it go so long, but today I even said - hey this is not going in a good direction - it needs to stop - and it did momentarily - but the last word needs to be had and needs to be had and needs to be had.  And I'm sitting here hoping that I've let the last word be had by someone else.  How many times are you told "maybe you should have done X" as an answer to an argument before the last word ends up being "yeah, you're right"  I don't ever want that to be the last word, so here, I vent, so that it isn't the last word today and it never is the last word.

Happiness is....

... another finished object - especially when it's the afghan I've been working on for 4 months.  I'll be delivering the gift to my brother-in-law and his fiancee this Saturday at their shower.  So - a full shot and a close up shot.  Now back to knitting for me!

Happiness is....

....10 years together.  Ten years ago tonight, A & I had our first date.  I remember him telling me how much he loved his job, I remember thinking what a nice butt he had.  It was hot that night.  We went to Smith & Wollensky's in mid-town.  Afterwards, he walked me back to Grand Central Terminal and he kissed me goodbye.  Ten years later I still love kissing that man.

Tuesday weigh in

And it's good - down over a pound.  Still need another pound plus to be at my pre-vacation weight.  My goal is five more pounds - well really six, because I would like to break a barrier.  I'm feeling good, back on the program - although I will be cheating tonight - hot date with the hubby.  Anyway - getting up in the morning to walk is going well and sometimes I sneak in an evening walk with the dog - so it's good.

I haz a sad

Actually 2 sads.  One if for me and is kind of selfish.  Maybe not just kind of, maybe really truly, but please don't judge.  I found out that a friend is pregnant.  This is a friend who had professed to not want kids.  This is a second marriage for both her and her husband and he has custody of his son from his first marriage.  She would talk about not really wanting kids, but being cool with the stepson.  In that circle of friends, it was good for me to have a fellow childless person.  Even though she has the stepson and is a good mother to him, she and I could together be the ones who hadn't gone through labor, childbirth, diapers, etc.  Now, I'm alone.  I'll be the only one on the outside looking in now and that makes me sad.
My other sad is for me, for my whole family - but most especially for my favorite aunt.  My uncle has been diagnosed with lung cancer that has metastisized to his bones.  It's not good.  I don't know how much longer we'll have him.  Truth is, the last few years, he's been a grumpy gus and no fun to be around.  But I still love him and don't want to lose him.  I'm so sad for my aunt.  They've been married over 50 years.  We all know that someday we will all die, but how do you deal with it when you know it's coming.  How do you face things like his birthday this week is probably his last birthday.  How do you cope.  On the other hand, maybe it's a blessing to know it's coming, to be able to talk about things, to have time to express your love, to get to say goodbye.

BTW, I gained weight on vacation

And the title is the only thing in this post about my diet.  Today, I'm whining.  My husband had occasion yesterday to chat with some of my fellow town employees - a couple of cops.  Now, my relationship with the cops is not always the best - it's a management v union kind of thing.  They distrust management in general.  I have forged some good relationships, but there's always a little wariness on their part.  And, as with any department, sometimes I'm the one who wields the hammer - who says no, you can't do that.  Sometimes I'm nice about it.  Sometimes I can't be nice about it.  Sometimes, even though I am nice about it, I'm branded a bitch.  I don't enjoy that.  So, why this discussion?  Yesterday, my husband bonded with the cops over my being a bitch.  Yup.  That's what he did.  Told them how they might get it at work from me - but he gets it full force at home.  Yup.  That's what he said.  He thought it was funny. He even went on about how another employee will get something done for me either when he wants me to do something in return or when I go all out bitch on him.  How nice that my husband has bonded with the cops.  How nice that he has cemented my bitch reputation.  I was stunned last night when he related this to me.  I don't think he gets what he's done to me.  I should have addressed it with him right then, but I think I was too stunned to realize the full implication.  Now, I just want to cry.  I don't know how to undo what he did.  I don't know how to not care.
And then there's more.  He's always trying to convince me that I'm hot and sexy.  I'm glad he thinks I am.  I do see myself in the mirror and know that I can look good, but I am also realistic about myself.  So the latest thing to convince me of my hotness is to tell me that my number is up to 8.  What number you ask?  The number of guys in his firehouse that would ....um....well.....I'll just use his words.... that would want to fuck me if he died.  Over 5 is apparently a very good number.  I know that I should be flattered - but I'm sitting here thinking ewwwwwww - how do I face that group now, knowing that I've been discussed in that way.  At least I don't know which 8.  But seriously?  Guys talk about that at the firehouse?  What is up with that!  He's proud.  I'm skeeved.
And so it goes.  I just had to get that all out. 

Friday Photos

Flowers, flowers and more flowers, a little knitting and Boomer.

Happiness is....

.....touching base with old friends.  When my mom was down for the park rededication two weeks ago, I took her around to visit with some friends.  She hadn't seen some of them in a number of years.  It was fun to see them catch up.  And sad too, because it's entirely possible that she'll never see some of them again.  She doesn't come back to Connecticut too often these days, and even when she does, it's rarely to our old hometown.  So, I'm glad I was able to give her that chance, to sit and chat with old friends on a nice summer afternoon.

Still here

I've been a little busy, so haven't gotten to blogging lately.  I have done my weigh ins.  I was up a little last week, back down again this week.  That's an achievement actually - considering all the parties and dining out that I did this past week.  A 4th of July picnic, lunch and dinner out on Friday, picnic on Saturday - complete with Sangria and moonshine, plus some birthdays at work - it could have been bad!  But it wasn't.  But now, I'm headed up to the Cape for a week or so on Friday.  That can be dangerous.  I get out of my normal eating routines and tend to drink a glass of wine every night.  I do expect that I will get more exercise, but I think I need to watch it on the wine consumption.  And I need to plan for healthy meals and limit snacking.

Friday photos

Just one today, taken by a reporter for the local paper near my hometown, Michael Duffy.  Please don't rat me out for posting it.  Yesterday, my hometown rededicated the industrial park that was named after my father.  When my father was First Selectman (New England-speak for Mayor) of our Town, he negotiated the purchase of a large tract of land (600+ acres) to be used by the Town for an industrial park.  His thinking was that the commercial use would provide a strong tax base, many jobs and draw little on services - especially compared to the possibility of a residential development on the property.  When he died while in office, the Economic Development Commission that was overseeing the development of the property voted to name the industrial park for Daddy.  The Town recently decided to change the title to "business park" and so had a rededication.  We were invited for a ceremony.  It was so very nice.  We saw people we hadn't seen in many years.  But even nicer was hearing the tributes to my father for his tremendous vision.  The park has been open since the mid 80s and has generated over $20 million in tax revenues for the Town.  So, I'm there in the photo, in the white shirt.  That's my mom in the aqua shirt, with my nephew behind her.  The gentleman on the left is the youngest son of another man honored yesterday.  His dad was the chairman of the commission that guided the development of the park from it's inception until his death about 18 months ago.  They planted a tree and placed a memorial park in honor of the late chairman.  It wasw a nice day, a nice ceremony paying tribute to two men - one who had the vision and one who made the vision reality.

Happiness is...

....having a job.  That isn't what I originally planned for this week's post.  It was going to be about color in nature, but then I got an e-mail this morning that changed my mind.
Yesterday, I served on an interview panel for a municipal entity in a city near where I work.  It was for an accountant's position.  The last candidate of the day was a gentleman, probably in his mid to late fifties, who has been out of work for a couple of years.  It was a painful interview.  His interview skills are lacking, though based on his resume, his accounting skills are not.  There were long pauses between the questions and his answers.  I could see, as the interview progressed, that we were all trying to softball the questions and trying to coach him to good answers.  This morning, he sent me an e-mail thanking me for the interview - standard stuff.  I felt so bad.  His skill set isn't really the right one for this job - but I'm sure it will be for some other job - but with his poor interviewing skills, I think he may continue to be out of a job for a while.  I am very lucky to have a good job that I like and that is secure.  I am very happy not to have to be out there pounding the pavement.

Friday Photos

Lots of pictures of the garden - and there are more to come in the future.  And, of course, Boomer.

 These are two rose bushes that I transplanted when we had the driveway done.  They are surviving and blooming.  Yay!

 I'm not sure what this is, but I liked the orange blossom.

 I could do a whole study on this plant.  It's an ecinachea, aka coneflower - and the colors are great.

 A new garden area we created.  We got rid of some Rose of Sharon bushes.  The middle plant is a lamb's ear.  I love it!  Soft and pretty.

 Another addition last summer - decorative grass - that "bloomed" for the first time this summer.

 I love the changing colors on my hydrangea.

And - who else rounding up the photos but the Boom Doggie!