Saturday, March 31, 2007

1 step forward 2 steps back

I went to a funeral for a former co-worker on Friday. He also happened to be the father of some women I went through grammar school and high school with. I was doing a bit better mentally. I think it helped that I was going to be on my turf, in the presence of co-workers. The funeral was in my hometown, at my old church, old friends of mine and my parents would be there. So - after the funeral, I go to greet my father's best friend. His wife (my 3rd grade teacher) sees me first says "It is you! He said there was someone here who looked like you." Then he says to me "How's your baby?" Kick me in the gut. He thought that the last time he saw me I was holding a baby. I was just a little stunned. What could I say? "My baby's dead. Never even made it to being born"? Nope - just kind of stammered out a "no baby, got a dog though" answer. So then - back to work - dealing, go home, send what I think is a funny e-mail to my boss and a couple of other people, have pizza with A. Life goes on - right? This morning, I check my work e-mail. Well - one of the people I sent the funny e-mail too wasn't who I thought it was. It was a friend of my boss. I don't think she was mad - but she really didn't need to hear about the board member who picked his nose at our meeting and my wondering if it was caught on TV. So there went a pin in my little balloon of self-confidence. Tomorrow will be a better day. I'm depending on it.

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