Retread pictures

I didn't take any pictures this week.  I plan to take some next week - like the ones below.  What do they all have in common?  All take on the Cape.

Friday Photos...

A study of the Stink Doggie, aka the Boom Doggie.  A week ago tonight, Boomer got skunked.  Such fun.  The boy does not like being bathed, but we managed to get it done.  He's still a little stinky though.  I took these photos a couple of days after the skunking, playing with the Retro Camera app on my cell phone.  The stuffed animal on the floor next to him is Charlie the Chimp, his consolation prize for having to endure two baths.  This dog is spoiled!

Friday Photos

The usual - flowers, knitting and Boomer.  The knitting is two more squares for the blanket for our new niece.  I took the flower shots this morning.  Sadly, some of the shots that I thought would be really cool - like one I took of the shadow of the daisy on the fence did not come out.  There was too much light.  I need to learn more about how to work with different lighting.



Dog instincts

Sometimes it's hard to remember that, though domesticated, a dog is an animal with basic instincts.  Like - if the dog sees a bird in the garden, it is going to try to get the bird.  That's how my day started.  I let Boomer out to do his business.  I heard him making noise and went out to check what was going on.  He saw the bird in the garden and tried to get him.  The poor bird appeared injured and wouldn't stand a chance.  Thankfully another of his instincts - and apparently a higher one - is to do what his master tells him.  So, when I pulled him back and told him to get in the house, he did it - very reluctantly, but he did it.  When I left for my run, I checked the garden and didn't see the bird.  I knew that the bird was going to be prey for some larger animal because it was injured, I just didn't want it to be my animal.  I was glad it was gone from my yard.  At least I thought it was.  I came back from my run and let Boomer in the yard while I started to water flowers.  I saw him near a dark blob in the yard and thought at first it was a pile of poop.  I went to go pick it up.  It was the bird.  Boomer appears to have gotten it in some way.  There are little feathers on the ground, the bird is on it's side and Boomer is drooling.  Again, he did as I told him and went in the house.  He kept looking back as he sadly trudged back in, but he did as I told him.  I told the bird I was very sorry for what had happened - like it understood me.  The poor thing crawled back into the garden.  I'm so sad for that little bird.  I know that's a part of nature, part of life, but it's still sad.  And now I know I'll have to deal with a dead bird when I get home from work.

Happiness is....

....thunderstorms at midnight.  I don't wish for thunderstorms much - but I like them when they come in the middle of the night, when I'm safe and warm in bed with A next to me and Boomer in his bed nearby.  I feel extra safe then and the noise is kind of beautiful.  Also, those late night storms usually clear the air and you wake to a beautiful blue sky with only wispy clouds.  And even more - it means I don't have to water the garden.  All in all, a good thing.

2 good things yesterday

1.  Many times when I am feeling low, I indulge in cupcake therapy.  Or small cake therapy.  I go to Stop & Shop and get some of their cupcakes or one of those little 4 inch cakes they make.  And then I eat.  So good.  It must be buttercream icing and yellow cake.  My favorites.  I didn't do it yesterday.  I know I need to lose weight, so even though I was feeling down and really deserved a treat, I didn't indulge in cupcake therapy.  I did have a glass of wine, but that wasn't as bad as the cupcakes would have been.  So - YAY! for me.
2.  A is going to the Cape with me!  I didn't even have to talk to him about it!  He sent me a text yesterday saying he was good to go.  I am very, very happy about that.

Two steps forward, one step back

Better than one step forward, two steps back - right?  I go along, thinking I'm dealing with the whole childless thing pretty well, then WHAM.  It hits me and there I am alone in the bathroom crying.  My BIL and SIL had their second child yesterday.  This would be the pregnancy that was announced on their blog - the blindside last Christmas.  I thought I was doing well, but just seeing the pictures last night and reading the comments (love the era of smartphones and text messages) made me cry.  I am happy for my BIL & SIL, but I'm sad for me.  I'm sad for A.  We will never have that joy.  It's one of the few things in life that I've ever really, really, really wanted.  And I can't have it.  Yeah, I wanted a four bedroom house with an in-ground pool, a bar room and a two-car garage and I can't have that either, but it's just not the same.  It's not the primal, deep in your soul longing.
And, on the heels of this, related to this is a dilemma I may soon be facing.  A has mentioned wanting to go visit his brother after the baby is born.  We'll deliver gifts to both kids.  (Go back a couple of Fridays and see the blocks for the blanket I'm knitting the baby.)  My problem with that is that A has been reluctant or can't find the time to go with me to visit my mother on the Cape.  I don't think it's fair that he won't go see my family, yet I'm expected to go see his.  And, quite frankly, I'm hurt by his reluctance to go the the Cape to see my mother.  And while my mother will never be pushy and nag us like his mother did over having two Christmas celebrations last year, my mother does drop the occasional "Gee, I haven't seen A since..."  That makes me feel like shit.  I feel like I have to make excuses for him.  Yeah, there was that one time we were on the Cape, when he had gotten somebody to switch tours with him and his firehouse was involved in the Deutsche Bank fire.  They pulled out the two guys who were killed.  It was scary and upsetting while he tried to find out if it was someone from his company that got killed.  And he felt bad that he had asked someone to switch with him - but that's what they do all the time.  And yes, every guy that agrees to swap takes a risk that he will be injured or killed while working the other guy's tour - but they are both taking that risk.  It's not reason to avoid going to visit my mother.  So, I'm going to have to deal with this.  It will be uncomfortable, but right now, I think that when we next discuss him going to the Cape with me for a few days, I'm going to lay it on the line.  If he doesn't go to the Cape, I'm not going to Maine.  He's free to go and visit without me.  My family deserves equal treatment to his.

Friday Photos

The first shot is some ground cover I've had for a while.  I actually took some of it last fall, after it had gone to seed and planted it in another part of the garden - and it took!  Yay me!  The other shots are mostly recent additions to the garden, including herb in a pot.  Right above the herbs is a shot of my dinner plate dahlia.  I planted that thing 3 or 4 years ago.  You are supposed to pull them for the winter in our area.  I can't be bothered.  That plant keeps coming up year after year, warm winter or nasty one like last year.  And it produces amazing blooms.  And then there's Boomer - doing what he does best.  Nap.

Happiness is...

.....exercising in the morning.  It really does start the day off right.  It's worth it to get up that little extra bit early.  And I have help with that, since the Boom Doggie doesn't seem to ever get the concept of sleeping in.  When he's ready to get up, he expects that at least one of his peoples will get up with him.  Usually that's me.  So, off I went this morning at 6:20, walked to the high school track, did my mile run, did a little extra since I'm trying to build up my endurance at this speed, then walked home.  Ready to move on with the rest of the day.

I think this is bigotry of a sort

I heard what I think amounts to some form of bigotry on Friday.  It still has me thinking, puzzled.  A little background - I work for a town in Connecticut.  Connecticut allows same sex marriages.  There is no waiting period to get a marriage license in our town - just the time it takes to fill out the application and pay the fee.  Being relatively close to one of the state lines, we tend to get a decent amount of out-of-state same sex couples seeking to marry here.  So, apparently two women came in to get married on Friday.  Apparently they were both attractive women.  One of my employees saw them.  What still has me sitting here thinking "did I really hear that" was her comments.  She didn't understand it.  She thought it was a shame they were lesbians, because they were attractive.  She could understand it if they were ugly, but what a shame because they are pretty women.   I did not know what to say back to her.  I was just at a loss to understand her thought process, but she is of a different generation and culture, so maybe that's it.  I don't know.  I just sat there and thought "Seriously?"

Friday Photos

More garden - just the hydrangeas from the front of the house, a little knitting - the first two squares from a log cabin blanket I'm making for the coming niece or nephew, and of course, Boomer.

Happiness is....

....a brand new driveway!  YAY!  Looking back at the whole house buying thing, it's kind of funny what you don't pay a whole lot of attention to at the time.  I don't think we realized just how bad the driveway was when we bought our house.   That first winter, we definitely knew.  Chunks of pavement would come up each time we used the snowblower.  The driveway was at least 50 years old.  At some point, as pavement does in the Northeast, it heaved.  The heave was in the center.  Some prior owner attempted to correct the situation by paving along the sides of the section that had heaved.  Yeah.  That was a smart move.  Guess which part was destined to break up first!  This winter, after I did a lot of the snowblowing, chunks were flying in to the yard, against the house, once almost taking out a window.  I told A it was time.  Let's get it done.  I told him that I didn't care if we needed to use the money we had been saving for a trip to celebrate my 50th.  The driveway needed doing.  Well, we had a good tax year, some nice year end overtime and had plenty of funds.  They started last Wednesday tearing it up and by the end of the day Thursday, I not only had a new driveway, but it was edged in belgian block.  So lovely!!  So smooth!!  And the enterprising contractors picked up two other jobs in our neighborhood as a result of the work they were doing for us.  Happiness all around!

Swatch it!

I am planning to knit a new top.  I did a gauge swatch yesterday.  This is the first time I did one wear I blocked the swatch.  The pattern said to do it - and after my experience of my last top growing on me, I wasn't skipping that step.  Important to note that the pattern for my last top did not suggest measuring gauge after blocking.  How I wish it had.  I haven't done a lot of swatching, but mainly because in a lot of my projects, gauge didn't matter too much - other than for making sure you had enough yarn.  That lesson was enough to make me swatch from now on - and to always order more yarn than I need.  You can always make something with leftovers.  So, I knit the swatch and measured pre-blocking.  I upped the size of the needle partway through my swatch, just in case the recommended size was too small.  I figured that was better than having to go back and do a whole new swatch.  Then, I soaked it and blocked it and this morning, measured the dry swatch.  I'm so glad I followed the instructions to measure after blocking.  Turns out the recommended needle size will work nicely.  Hopefully before too long, I'll have a nice new top to wear to dress up jeans or khakis.

what's a girl to do?

You're getting ready to head out early, walk to the high school so you can run on the track.  See if you can last longer than yesterday's mile.  A 12 minute mile - so proud of myself.  May I digress - having gotten near the end of the Couch to 5K program, I was running for 25 minutes at a time, but only at 4.5 mph.  If I really want to run a 5k, I need to get my speed up.  So, now that I'm used to running, I'm trying to run faster and then build up my distance.  So, I'm happy with my 5 mph and plan to know work up from there.  Now, back to the story.  There I am, running shoes on.  Vise - I mean running bra - in place.  Ipod ready, sunglasses on....and there he is.....the cutest freaking dog in the world.  So excited.  In his mind, I'm getting ready to take him for a walk.  He is just so happy.  What could I do!  Off came the iPod.  Out came the poopy bags.  Me and my puppy boy went for a walk. 

Happiness is....

....AIR CONDITIONING!!  God Bless the inventor of the air conditioner!  It was hot yesterday.  It's going to be hotter today and still hotter tomorrow.  I really do not know how people survived without air conditioning.  I suppose you just find a way.  And perhaps we are spoiled by the A/C.  If we didn't have it then maybe we would just adjust?  But, for me, I'm glad not to have to adjust.  I'm very grateful for the A/C.

Sex and the City II

I finally got around to watching Sex and the City II last night.  I enjoyed the series and the first movie, but had heard enough bad reviews of the second movie to wait a while.  I'm glad I did.  I never liked Miranda much, nor do I care for the actress.  It's partly her teeth.  Yeah - shallow I know.  But in this movie, she was just the worst.  They all were horrible caricatures of their characters.  It was just horrible.  I didn't mind the story line much.  It was a bit of a joke, but the characters were just worse.  I am so glad I waited to see it for free on HBO, rather than paying to see it at the theater. 

Weekend Photos

Yes, it's time for garden shots.  And Boomer lazing in the yard shots. 

41 years ago today

41 years ago today, I was probably sitting in my 3rd grade classroom, not knowing that the most important person in my life was entering the world.  Today is A's birthday.  He is just the most wonderful thing that every happened to me.  I love him very much.  I love his eyes, I love his hugs, I love his kisses, I love his hair, I love his butt, I love his smile.  I love to hold his hand when we walk.  I love to just sit in the living room together, not doing anything in particular.  I love to work beside him in the yard.  I love to travel with him.  He's just the best.  Happy Birthday honey!!

Happiness is...

...flowers in bloom and a soft place to lay your head. 

Back on the diet train

I fell off.  How badly, I don't know.  I haven't looked at the scale in a while. I told A that we both need to get our acts together, set a goal to be in shape for our friend's wedding in the DR in September.  That certainly is plenty of time.  But I need to do something more immediate.  I'm dealing with a limited wardrobe because of just 5 or so pounds.  I really want to lose 10 - but even getting rid of 5 will open up my options wardrobe-wise, so I really need to get on it.  I also need to get back to my C25K program.  I was up to running for 25 minutes.  Then my latest cold while in San Antonio set me back.  I settled for walk 5, run 10, walk 5, run 10.  I think that's still pretty good.  My goal is to run a 5K before turning 50.  I don't think that the distance will be a problem, I can get there, but I want to get faster.  We'll see how it goes.

Pictures on a weekend

I was playing with my filters a couple of weeks ago.  So - you are being treated (or subjected) to a series of photos of the same subject - one of my azaleas - with different lenses and filters.  And, as always, a shot of Boomer.

to plan or not to plan

I got to thinking about planning your life when I learned that someone I knew was having her third child.  It's none of my business, but I have to admit that the first thing that came to mind was "I wonder if this was a surprise or did they plan this."  Followed by "if she planned this - what was she thinking?"  Now - I thought that because of my knowledge of her family situation and her work situation.  My primary concern was her having a 3rd child considering things that may happen with her work and, if they do happen, her family situation is not ideal for handling the circumstance.  Again, none of it is really any of my business - but it got me thinking about planning your life and how much should you plan?  There's a saying that goes something like "life is what happens while you're busy making plans".  We really do have the capability to do family planning in ways that they didn't in years past.  Of course, we don't have quite the capabilities that some people think we do!  Planning when not to have a family by preventing is much easier to do than planning conception.  I think that some people end up regretting having planned and waited.  If you're doing that - determining when it is the right time has got to be the hardest.  If you wait for it all to fall into place - well - that just might never happen.  I don't think there is ever a "perfect" time.  Money, siblings, work, day care, housing, cars - too many things can make it a bad time.  Had my parents waited for the right time, I may not exist.  They had just moved in with my father's mother.  Picture this living situation - my father's sister and her husband lived in the first floor apartment with their two children.  We shared the second and third floor with my grandmother.  Her bedroom was on the second floor.  My father converted the attic into two bedrooms - one for him and Mom and one for the three of us kids.  Certainly not an ideal situation - but they decided the timing was right.  Weird, I know.  And for this woman - given what she does for a living, the timing may never be good for her to plan her 3rd child.  If she had waited for a resolution to what she faces at work, it may have ended up being too late for her to have more children.  I won't deny that it worries me what may happen to that little family, but really -  you could have the perfect circumstances to expand your family and tomorrow, your spouse gets hit by a bus on the way home from work and then, not so perfect after all.  So, I say just do it.  Do what comes naturally and let life happen.  If you want more kids, do it.  If you want to take that job, go for it.  Don't be stupid and overextend yourself, but if opportunity arises, think real long and hard before you pass it up waiting for the "right" time.  That right time may never come.

Friday Photos

Happiness is...

....a white dog with brindle, green and purple patches.  What?  Green and purple?  Yup.  The green I'm assuming is from him rolling around in the grass, which he will do.  But it's on the top of his head - kind of weird.  The purple I'm not quite sure about.  That appeared this morning.  In the mornings, if it's nice out, we tend to leave the back door open and just let him wander around the back door doing whatever it is he does.  This morning, he came in, sat next to me, waiting for me to finish my breakfast and get him his breakfast.  As he sat there, I noticed this spot, which at first looked pinkish and I thought was his skin - fearing he had injured himself.  Nope.  It was a purple spot.  Who knows what he was rolling in, but my puppy dog now has green and purple spots alongside his beautiful brindle patches.

If you can't say something nice....

.....don't say anything at all.  My mom says that all the time.  I try to follow it.  So today, I'm going to follow it as best I can.  The man who defeated my father in his last run for First Selectman (mayor) of our town passed away this week.  Had my father been a lesser man, a man without a high level of integrity, a man who didn't insist on running on his outstanding record, but instead told some sad, but unfortunate truths about his opponent, then my father would have won re-election easily.  Instead, he lost by a slim margin.  My father was gracious in defeat.  Sadly, winners are not always gracious.  Their wives even less so.  If my father had won re-election, then perhaps when he died suddenly two weeks later, perhaps his opponent and his wife would not have put on a distasteful display on at my father's funeral.  The town would not have suffered through two years of embarassing leadership and smudging of ethical lines.  My mother would have been spared the pain caused by two people trying to justify their actions and glorify their position.

So, back to my mother's credo.  I don't need to really say anything bad about him.  He said it himself some years ago when accused of an ethical violation and someone suggested that he was either stupid or dishonest.  His own words were "I would rather be called dishonest than stupid."  Allrighty then.

Friday Photos

Not my photo - but pertinent for today.  Coming soon, to a patio near me....

I am excited to be getting a patio set.  It's being delivered this morning.  We can have guests comfortably for an outdoor meal.  It will match a coffee and side table we already have, so we could set up a little seating area with some of the chairs.  Now all we have to do is get an umbrella.

Happiness is....

....sometimes nothing in particular.  It's work going well, flowers growing, simple dinners with loved ones, a nice walk, a good run.  Or, it can be realizing that your lot in life is pretty good.  So - some good things from the past week, just randomly....

• my boss supporting me on something important
• learning how to turn a heel knitting socks
• having an indoor job on a rainy day
• ordering new patio furniture
• cooking dinner for myself
• a good workout
• eating something new (tres leches cake) and liking it
• playing with the dog in the yard

DEAD!

I was watching TV on a non-major network.  A came up and told me to switch to the news, that Bin Laden was dead.  American forces had killed him. I felt like celebrating.  Is that horrible?  This morning, I still feel like celebrating, but it's tempered with tears for those he killed.  I'll be flying my flag today.