Tuesday, April 24, 2012
Sharing experience, trying to help
The wife of someone I know recently suffered a miscarriage. When the husband first announced her pregnancy and I found out she was only 6 weeks along, I did an inner cringe and thought that he shouldn't be sharing the news so soon. Sadly I was right. We talked yesterday, she's having a hard time. Well, who wouldn't be having a hard time. Sadly, her closest female relatives don't get it and are bumbling with being supportive and falling into age old traps - like thinking it would be good to be around babies. Oy. So, he came to me to see what I had done, to whom had I turned for help. I gave him the name of the therapist I saw. I offered to be available to his wife. I was honest about the general suckiness of their reality. The sad thing, for me, is that I can offer support, I can offer advice, I can listen, but I can't make their pain go away any faster. And I really wish I could.